Tag Archives: family

As long as someone answers

“Every Tuesday at 3 PM, my mother calls the same wrong number.

Has for six years.

“Hello, this is Susan. Is Robert there?”

Same response every time, “No Robert here. Wrong number.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry to bother you.”

Then she hangs up. Sets a reminder for next Tuesday.

I thought it was dementia. Mom’s 71. Maybe forgetting she’d already tried this number.

“Mom, that’s not Robert’s number. You’ve called it 300 times. Why do you keep calling?”

She looked at me strangely. “I know it’s not Robert’s number.”

“Then why”

“Because someone answers.”

Turned out, the woman who answers is 83. Lives alone. Has severe social anxiety. Never leaves her apartment. No family. No friends.

“Six years ago, I called your brother’s old number by mistake,” Mom explained. “Woman answered. We talked for two minutes. When I apologized for the wrong number, she said, ‘Please call again anyway. Nobody calls me.'”

“So you just… kept calling?”

“Every Tuesday. We talk for exactly twelve minutes. About nothing. Weather. TV shows. Her cat. Then I say I have to go, and she says okay.”

“For six years?”

“For six years.”

“Does she know you’re calling on purpose?”

“Of course. I’m not subtle. But we maintain the fiction. I ‘accidentally’ call. She ‘happens’ to answer. We pretend it’s chance, not choice.”

“Why the pretend?”

“Because accepting help is hard. Accepting a wrong number is easy.”

Mom’s phone buzzed. Tuesday, 3 PM reminder.

She dialed. “Hello, this is Susan. Is Robert there?”

A pause. Then laughter. “No Robert here, Susan. But I’m here. How was your week?”

I listened to them talk. About the weather. A TV show. The cat’s vet appointment.

Twelve minutes exactly. Then, “I should let you go.”

“Okay, Susan. Same time next week?”

“Oh, I’m sure I’ll accidentally dial this number again.”

More laughter. Goodbye.

Mom hung up. Looked at me. “Her name is Dorothy. I’ve never met her. Don’t know her last name. Don’t know her address. Just her voice every Tuesday for twelve minutes.”

“What if you stop calling?”

“Then she stops having Tuesdays.”

Mom died last year. Suddenly. Heart attack.

I found Dorothy’s number in her phone. Called it.

“Hello?”

“Hi. My name is Sarah. I’m Susan’s daughter. I think… I think you were expecting her call today.”

Silence. Then crying.

“She’s gone, isn’t she?”

“Yes. I’m so sorry.”

“Can I ask you something? Did she ever tell you why she really called?”

“She said you needed someone to call.”

“That’s what she told you. But I’m calling to tell you why I answered. Because your mother’s voice on Tuesdays was the only thing that kept me alive. I had the pills ready four times. Four different Tuesdays. And every time, at 3 PM, she called. And I couldn’t do it after hearing her voice.”

I’ve been calling Dorothy every Tuesday for nine months now.

Same time. Same “wrong number” fiction.

Because my mother taught me, sometimes the most important call you make is to the wrong person.

On purpose.

Every Tuesday.

For as long as someone answers.

Credit: Grace Jenkins

Posted to Facebook @ https://www.facebook.com/suki.jacobs/posts/pfbid033rNeyhj8CavMvo7WY9NAiHuETSZRHNRJVm5xnErLr39qhF1DKDiT8vTTTURf5R5Pl

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Bits & Bytes

DAILY PRAYER: Dear Lord, Protect us from the sin of schadenfreude. In Jesus’ Name, we pray. Amen.

1A: The ACLJ successfully defended the First Amendment rights of Brett Raio and two of his preacher friends who were arrested on the streets of Chicago for telling people about Jesus.

CHARLIE KIRK: CLICK https://www.youtube.com/shorts/tFo3sXZaZ6s [2:52] to hear Charlie on racism. IMO, two things show how absurd racism is. One is a biracial couple in England who have had two sets of twins; both sets have one white and one black child. The other is cross-racial organ donation. Organ donors have to match recipients so closely that often family members can’t donate, yet blacks and whites have been both donors and recipients of each others organs. QED.

EDUCATION: [5:11] – I’m glad I was able to go to college, especially since I finished free of debt, but strictly speaking, I didn’t need it to be an artist and a homemaker. My husband, however, is an architect, so yeah, college. When Dearest was struggling to get his career started, we bumped into a guy from my old neighborhood who had apprenticed in a trade after high school. We were living in a really crappy apartment, barely making ends meet while we paid off Dearest’s college loans. Eddie was a master mason who owned two houses.

EVERYDAY HEROES: Posted by Save the Storks FB – “Shaye came to a Save the Storks partner pregnancy clinic–Pregnancy Center of Rockford– after walking from a nearby hotel where she and her two young children had just been placed by a local organization. She thought she might be 20 weeks pregnant and came in for a pregnancy test and ultrasound—but it quickly became clear she needed more than medical care.

“As she opened up to her client advocate, Shaye shared that they were fleeing abuse and barely surviving. With so much instability, she wasn’t sure she could keep the baby—not because she didn’t care, but because she did. She asked if adoption was an option. Her advocate gently assured her that they could connect her to a supportive, no-pressure agency where she would remain in control of every decision. The relief on her face was immediate.

“Before she left, the clinic gave her gift cards, pull-ups, food, and hygiene items—things she and her kids urgently needed. She had come in anxious and overwhelmed, but she left with a plan, a sense of peace, and the knowledge that she wasn’t alone. Hope started to grow where fear had taken root.”

MEDIA: CLICK https://www.msn.com/en-us/tv/news/ex-msnbc-anchor-complains-people-are-publicly-lamenting-kimmel-s-show-being-suspended-not-anything-about-me/vi-AA1MY01I [:53] to hear Matthew Dowd whine because nobody cares that he got fired.

PRAYER for OUR NATION: Dear Lord, We thank You for the upsurge in church attendance. Please bless us all to keep it up. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

GRAMMY NOTES: Mama Buzz and I are currently enthralled by the Great British Sewing Bee. She emailed me this photo saying, “I got a double hug from you today while watching our show!” I made both of those blankets for her. ❤

SHORTS:

CLICK https://www.youtube.com/shorts/tZX4fbsyzeU to watch a guy who actually gets paid to do this stuff.

CLICK https://www.youtube.com/shorts/-XXKowXZ5wM to see what he did about the ice maker.

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Dear Mom

I got this in my email today. “Army Princess” gave me permission to share it, so long as I removed the names. I hope it gives you a fraction of the joy it gave me! ❤

Dear Mom,

Hello! I have a question/favor to ask. I’m working on a case study/proposal for one of my classes to show how an existing non-profit operating in Kosovo could add a Life Center to their portfolio – why they should, how it could happen.

For my final I’m working on a presentation. I’m thinking about opening the presentation by humanizing the issue. Kosovo doesn’t have any life centers in the country and the number one client for abortion tend to be young mothers who already have 1-2 children, and are struggling financially. Kosovo has the highest rate of unemployment in Europe and the lowest GDP. Culturally pregnancy issues are not spoken of. Only healthy pregnancies that happen within a marriage are acceptable to discuss. There are approximately 10 Life centers in all of the Balkans providing counseling to women in scary pregnancy situations.

This encompasses unplanned pregnancies, post-abortion trauma, miscarriages, and infertility grief. It seems these centers are one of the only places women in the Balkans know they can really go and talk to someone about their fear. Unless they seek out an abortion facility – also quiet and not discussed. My current thought to open and close with – is to show how important it is to have someone to talk to about your fears, and someone to help you through the hard times and know that there is someone there who will listen, take your concerns seriously and help you find solutions.

Doing the research made me think of you and Daddy when you found out you were pregnant with [our baby sister]. If you’re comfortable with it, I was thinking about showing a family photo of the four of us before she was born and introducing the family and stating two small children, financial concerns and then added to that – the health concern. Highlighting how important it was that you had people to support you, to pray for you, and to help you through. And then show a photo of her in her Marine uniform and mother of four. That the support you received when you were pregnant, didn’t just result in a baby. It resulted in a life that impacted many, a life that supported the future of the country and a life that continues to add goodness and hope into the world.

That’s my idea. But I realize it is really personal and while it is anonymous – I wouldn’t want to do that without your permission. If you’re okay with it, could you send me some photos from that year? Love you! And thank you for raising us with such great awareness on Life.

“Army Princess”

PHOTOS:

  1. May 1985 – Army Princess, me, Dearest when he (finally) finished his B.Arch. degree. I am extremely hypersensitive to progesterone, which is 8x higher during pregnancy; I am also Rh-sensitized, so my first two were Rh babies. We were not supposed to have another child, but God had other ideas. When we found out I was pregnant, Dearest had just embarked on his third try at finishing his degree; he was working full time and his very generous boss had not only granted him time to go to classes, but had paid half the tuition! For months of the pregnancy, I was in a tremendous amount of pain and wasn’t able to walk further than the bathroom. Our two little ones (born November 1981 and October 1983) were in full time day care until Daddy got home from work, then he had to do all the household and child care everything while trying to finish his degree.
  2. June 1985 – #3 hit the danger zone for Rh disease at around 22 or 24 weeks, so I had to have 7 amnios. The irritation in my uterus caused premature labor; the drug I had to take made me sicker. We had to take C-section classes, because they were certain I’d never be able to deliver naturally, but I’m also allergic to narcotics, so post-operative pain was a big concern.
  3. August 1985 – God be praised and chalk it up to a whole lot of help from relatives, friends, and loving strangers … our bills got paid, Daddy got his degree, Mommy survived, and baby thrived. She went full term, was born without surgery, and was healthier afterward than her previous sibling had been … which just does not happen with Rh disease! Our doctor said, “You can call it a ‘miracle’ if you want to. I sure can’t explain it.”
  4. September 1985 – (l to r) Army Princess, Mama Buzz, and Dearest at the picnic we had after #3’s Baptism.

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