U.S.—Since the shocking revelation last week of Hollywood boss Harvey Weinstein’s decades-long reign of habitual sexual harassment and assault on coworkers and associates, during which he allegedly paid off at least eight women to keep quiet about the abuse, a source close to the nation’s most popular late night hosts revealed that they are all so disgusted by Weinstein’s harmful and deviant actions that they refuse to even mention his name.
“Even though they lampooned people like Roger Ailes and Bill O’Reilly after similar allegations, what Weinstein has done is so grotesque and at odds with their values that they won’t so much as utter his name on their shows,” the source with direct access to Jimmy Kimmel, Seth Myers, Jimmy Fallon, Stephen Colbert, and James Corden said, adding that it is “utterly detestable” to them that one of the most powerful men in Hollywood used his immense wealth and influence to shame and silence his victims for three decades.
“Some of them tried to practice pieces on this scandal in their show rehearsals, and it was just too much for them. They ended up either too physically ill to continue, or in a puddle of tears out of grief for the many victims of this monster,” he also revealed.
The anonymous source also added that Weinstein’s vocal support of myriad liberal causes, his unabashed support of feminism, and his participation in activities such as women’s marches, only made the scandal that much more horrendous—until it was more than the popular TV personalities could bear.
“They’re just hoping their silence shames him,” he added.
HOLLYWOOD, CA—Kicking off a rousing and emotional monologue on his Jimmy Kimmel Live! late-night talk show Tuesday during which he laid out yet another case for the common-sense nature of his views on policy and the evil barbarism of those who hold different views, host Jimmy Kimmel reached into his desk and produced a document officially declaring himself America’s greatest moral authority.
“I know some people have questioned my impassioned political speeches, so let me just show you this,” Kimmel said before presenting the document for all the world to see. “I guess I assumed it was obvious due to the tone of my lectures and the obvious emotion behind them, but just in case anyone is unclear—I am, in fact, this nation’s highest moral authority.”
The paper, which contained the words “Official Document” in bold at the top, appeared to have read “This document officially certifies James Christian Kimmel as The United States of America’s highest moral authority; furthermore, as the sole arbiter of truth within the land.”
“Go ahead and zoom in on it,” the host said as he held the paper still for a moment. “Take a good look. And check out those asterisks at the top—this is the real deal. I sincerely hope none of you will question my authority again.”
“So whether I’m holding court about nationalized health care, women’s rights, or gun control: I am right, and only right, all the time. And if you disagree with me, you are wrong and you passionately want people to die,” he added.
At publishing time, the document’s origins are unknown, with most experts hypothesizing that Kimmel himself printed it out in his office before the show.
SEATTLE, WA—After reading several chapters from the gospels over the weekend, local progressive believer Wendy Butler reportedly published a Patheos blog post in which she criticized Jesus of Nazareth for “not being very Christlike.”
The blog post took Jesus to task for His “unloving and problematic” teachings.
“He devotes entire sections of His sermons to ranting about archaic religious concepts like hell and the last judgment instead of just coming alongside the marginalized and affirming their sins,” Butler said. “Very little of what He did on earth I would describe as life-giving. Frankly, I do a better job of being Christlike than Christ Himself.”
The woman was also agitated to find that Jesus didn’t devote any of His time recorded in the Scriptures to advocating for government-subsidized healthcare or women’s abortion rights.
“He had a few good things to say about loving our neighbors, but the bad outweighs the good in Jesus’ teachings, if we’re looking at things honestly here,” her essay continued. “He really needed to ask Himself, ‘What would Jesus do?’ more often, and then He’d have devoted a lot more of His time to social justice, like me.”
At publishing time, a horrified Butler had discovered the description of the Redeemer coming in His wrath in Revelation 19.
While surfing the interwebs looking for things worth posting here, every now and again I come across some strange stuff. I’m trying to put a post together that has nothing to do with a bunch of spoiled millionaires thinking they’re being “rebels” by taking a knee during the national anthem. It’s all driven by the media and the Marxist wannabes and I’m a little sick of it. Anyway,here’s some candidates for the Darwin Award that goes to those begging to be removed from the gene pool.
Brothels dumping prostitutes in favour of sex robots as latest model ‘moans’
Samantha approaches visitors at the electronics festival – where it is currently being exhibited – by asking “How are you?” and is even seen looking people deep in their eyes or handing out hugs. IDEAL FOR THE UNWASHED ANTIFA CREEPS STILL LIVING IN THEIR MOM’S BASEMENT. http://www.dailystar.co.uk/news/latest-news/643384/Sex-robots-dolls-brothel-prostitutes-buy-video
Man gets body part stuck in a weight at the gym WHERE DO THESE PEOPLE COME FROM?
Firefighters in Worms, Germany were called in to help free a man who got his body part stuck in the hole of a 2.5kg (5.5 pound) weight at a gym. With the help of a grinder and a hydraulic saw, they were able to break the weight into 5 parts, freeing the man’s penis. http://www.fox32chicago.com/news/man-gets-body-part-stuck-in-a-weight-at-the-gym
3 teens arrested after armed threat to kill McDonalds employees when food was not ready The three men went into the McDonalds in the Chantilly Shopping Center at about 9 p.m. Thursday. When their food was not ready, an argument broke out. One man pulled up his shirt to show a gun in his waistband and threatened to kill the employees, according to a statement from Fairfax County Police. http://wjla.com/news/local/3-teens-arrested-after-armed-threat-to-kill-mcdonalds-employees-when-food-was-not-ready
THE REICH FIT
Adolf Hitler’s underpants have been sold for £5,000 at an auction in the US
The infamous leader left his pants in the laundry after staying at an Austrian hotel in 1938
THE ‘pristine’ underpants of fearsome führer Adolf Hitler have sold for £5,000 at an auction in the US.
The brutal dictator’s briefs, which have a ‘surprisingly large’ 39-inch waist and are initialled ‘A.H.’, were left behind in a suite at the luxury Parkhotel Graz in Austria after he stayed there in April 1938. THAT SETTLES THE QUESTION: BOXERS OR BRIEFS? https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/4534362/adolf-hitlers-underpants-have-been-sold-for-5000-at-an-auction-in-the-us/
Lingerie-clad Miami high school cheerleaders cause controversy by dressing in stockings and suspenders as they perform hip gyrating routines
Cheerleaders at a Miami High School were performing as part of a football game
They are shown wearing stockings and suspenders are part of their outfits
Their dance appears to be composed mostly of hip gyrations http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4916158/Miami-high-school-cheerleaders-dressed-lingerie.html#ixzz4tgRLDcRj
Democrats Eagerly Hail It As A Sign….Just Not Sure What
Yesterday, Hillary Clinton tweeted out a video that left me slack-jawed in disbelief.
You have to watch it.
Because, honey, it is horrifying.
Big Fur Hat from iotwreport.com came up with this:
Los Feliz Daycare(motto: “We do not accept immunized children”) is an ultra-progressive child care center in an unspecified affluent neighborhood on the left coast. Some recent tweets:
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IDEAL FOR THE UNWASHED ANTIFA CREEPS STILL LIVING IN THEIR MOM’S BASEMENT.
WHAT A SHITTY WAY TO DIE (SORRY, I COULDN’T RESIST)
WHERE DO THESE PEOPLE COME FROM?
The three men went into the McDonalds in the Chantilly Shopping Center at about 9 p.m. Thursday. When their food was not ready, an argument broke out. One man pulled up his shirt to show a gun in his waistband and threatened to kill the employees, according to a statement from Fairfax County Police.
THAT SETTLES THE QUESTION: BOXERS OR BRIEFS?
polination.blog 