The Story of Me

In July of this year, I began attending the once monthly, deliverance sessions provided on-line by exorcist and licensed psychologist, Monsignor Stephen Rossetti of the St. Michael’s Center. The video above is of the September 19 deliverance session which I attended live; they say the prayers work even if you do them with the recorded video. You can do the prayers for yourself and/or for family members or friends. And they don’t need to be for anything you can specifically identify as demonic; Satan and his minions take advantage of all kinds of normal problems, seeking to aggravate them, encourage sin and prevent healing.

I can attest to the benefits! Ever since I nearly died in 2016, I have kept daily records of my symptoms, energy levels, etc. as a way of searching out patterns and trends. I use these records to help me tweak my daily protocols and treatments so I get the most benefit from them. And, because of these extensive records, I know for a fact that, since I started doing these deliverance sessions, my energy has gone up dramatically while my pain has decreased just as dramatically. And the latest session came with a very fun bonus!

Dearest and I say a daily rosary together. I use the rosary I inherited from his sweet grandmother, because I love the history as well as the feel of it. The beads and cross are black-painted wood, while the loops, chains, support for the cross, and the corpus and sign are silver-toned metal. Or I should say “were”, because yesterday the corpus and sign turned to a gold-tone! I had a hard time getting a good photo, because my available light sources all gave a slightly yellow cast to the silvery bits. But trust me. They are definitely white-silver colored; only the corpus and sign have turned a yellow-gold color.

Now, about the reason I need so much deliverance work. I am a survivor of Satanic Ritual Abuse (SRA) that left me with an untold number of live-in demons, Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD), and chronic Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Now, I want to be clear. The abuse had nothing to do with my family. I was born with a gigantic, dark brown birth mark on my right leg. Because the skin was both ugly and thin, I had to have three plastic surgeries done as soon as my thighs had grown enough to provide enough harvestable skin.

Each surgery required two weeks of hospitalization in a distant city. And because my folks had 4 older kids at home, they had little choice but to drop me off and pick me up, trusting the hospital to take good care of me in between. And for the most part, they did. Unfortunately, when I tried to tell my surgeon that bad guys were coming in the night to hurt me, he laughed it off as nightmares. But it wasn’t. It was a coven.

The long-term stress damaged my immune system so badly that I was legally disabled by the time I was 20, but my immune disorders were not diagnosed until I was 30. Ten years later, I entered therapy where the MPD, PTSD, and SRA came out. I am so grateful to God that my therapist was already familiar with it all, so I got excellent care. I was in full time therapy for about 5 years, during which time my doctor taught us (kids too!) how to help me heal. I know that some multiples have no desire to integrate, but from day one, that has been my only goal. Before I appear before the Throne, I want to be the Chrissy that God meant me to be when he created me!

In March of 2021, a child alter emerged that we believe is the last bit of my brain that isn’t integrated. We lost count in the early years after we hit 90 alters. My doctor said that once a person knows how to split, that becomes the preferred coping mechanism and so, during the weeks and weeks I was hospitalized and brutalized, I just kept splitting and splitting and splitting. Best guess … I had more than 400 child alters who woke up sequentially from ca. 1996 until March 2021. Each one had her own distinct memories, traumas, and issues. Each had to be helped to understand what had happened and what she needed to do to heal.

Over the decades, I have had each one integrate, which is basically like merging two computer files or knocking out a wall in your home. All the same stuff is still there; it’s just all in one place instead of two (or 400). My best guess is that my brain grows new and/or activates existing neurons to allow the formerly separate memories to freely communicate.

Prior to March 2021, my Littles woke up regularly, worked through their stuff, forgave what needed forgiving, rebuked/renounced/rejected any demons that were attached, then integrated, at which point another Little would wake up. Occasionally, I had two or even three active at one time, which always turned out to be because they had split after a demon had attached and had to mutually agree to kick it out.

This current Little did all that work a long time ago, but she continues to be separate. We’ve been thinking the problem is not that she needs to do anything more, but that I do. So I’ve been really upping my holiness game and, with the dramatic progress I’ve made in energy and pain with the deliverance sessions, I’m hopeful that I’m close to being totally cleaned out and sealed up so Little Chrissy can finally integrate!


Filed under Loose Pollen

8 responses to “The Story of Me

  1. chrissythehyphenated

    My daughter sent this to me BEFORE I posted this! “May God open the heavens and give you a glimpse of how far you’ve come in this battle. You’re still standing! In Christ, you’re stronger than you know. May you see with eyes of faith how much progress you’ve made. May Jesus speak peace to your soul and strength to your heart. May you understand—on a whole new level—why God has allowed you to walk through this trial.” ❤

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Maureen Senzamici

    I am sorry for all you had to endure Aunt Chrissy.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I am so happy to read of such progress, Chrissy! We are all broken, of course, some more than others. But I have always perceived in prayer that these struggles are not pointless or shameful. Perhaps instead they will be badges of honor in the next life.

    Liked by 2 people

    • chrissythehyphenated

      I definitely believe that! And lately, I’ve been hearing the same message over and over and over, which is, “The surest path to holiness is suffering.”

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Especially meritorious may be those struggles involving actual spiritual and physical warfare with the demons who terrorize this world in the service of their dark master. Stay strong. You are fighting the good fight.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. chrissythehyphenated

    This morning, Mama Buzz sent this to me. “I’m excited and nervous for you…but mostly excited because it feels like another hugely positive sign we are almost DONE with your integration journey!!! There’s a reason you are always my answer when asked who my hero is xoxoxoxxoxo.”

    Liked by 2 people