Author Archives: Pistol Pete

Posted by Pistol Pete

Yesterday the Chicago Cubs celebrated the 100th anniversary of the opening of this woeful club’s one enduring attraction….Wrigley Field. I’ll never forget my first trip there with my granddad and his brother,my great-uncle Homer. I marveled at the enormity of it,the concrete,the steel girders,the crowds of people I wasn’t used to,and the playing field and scoreboard I had only seen on our black-and-white television. I’m 8 years old,sitting with Grampa,eating a hot dog from a vendor,trying to keep score with the program he bought and getting a Cubs pennant. Few things I have ever done in life have matched the wonderment of seeing my first game with Gramps.

He passed away in 1972,and if he were to return the first thing he’d ask is: ‘Have they won a World Series yet?’ Sadly,the cubs are in the 106th year of their 5 year rebuilding plan.In 1969,when they led the league until August before completely disintegrating I’ll never forget a heartbroken man coming home and saying: ‘They wouldn’t be the Cubs if they didn’t break your heart.’ I never forgot that.

Maybe that’s the way I feel when the political party I favor fails time and again to uphold the promises they made to get elected,preferring instead to consort with the same people they criticized while campaigning for their job. After years of disappointment I have determined the Cubs will never win another championship and the way it’s going the GOP will never again win the White House since they seem determined to grant amnesty to 30 million democrat voters.

Posted by Pistol Pete

Other than delivering my morning papers and an occaisional trip to Wally World,I’m pretty much a homebody. Lately I’ve been watching a lot of courtroom shows which are really pathetic,but amusing in a  bizarre way. Rent disputes,damaged property,dog bites,siblings suing each other,it’s all a little surreal. The best show is Paternity Court,which is just like Maury Poopoo. These stupid cows lay down for different studs then try to pin fatherhood on one of them. The concept of waiting until you’re married before having kids never once entered their vacuous skulls. Just to test my pain tolerance I once tuned in Morning Joke on MSDNC. I made it to about :45 before the bile started to climb in my throat and my gag reflex kicked in,my eyes started watering,my leg started shaking uncontrollably and my stomach cramped like I was trying to pass a cactus. It was then I decided watching freaks yelling at each other was more soothing than trying to ingest the sewage spread on that crap network on a daily basis.

THIS CAR WAS SPOTTED IN NORTHERN VIRGINIA (I DOUBT IT’S TING’S CAR)   

THE WISE LATINA RAILED ABOUT THE FACT THE DOOR TO COLUMBIA WAS OPENED TO HER THROUGH RACE-BASED PREFERENCES…. THE SAME DOOR LED YOU TO THE SUPREME COURT,CHICA.

Posted by Pistol Pete

This is Earth Day 2014. Barry is stopping over in Washington state to blow some hot air before skedaddling off to Tokyo where he’ll pretend he’s still relevant.

Get involved….go out and hug a tree,kiss a rock or make an offering of fruits and veggies to the sun.

Personally,I’m going to find an idiot with a “coexist” sticker on one side of his bumper and an Obama-Biden 2012 sticker on the other. I’m going to walk up,smile and punch him in the face as hard as I can. Coexist my butt.

Posted by Pistol Pete

Hope everybody had a safe and wonderful Easter. Posting late because things are very busy today.

It seems the liberals are getting more and more desperate. Illinois still spending money it doesn’t have,the Butcher becoming a grandmother…if it were not for her political advantage she would surely have insisted her ugly-ass kid get an abortion.

Mooch is getting more and more obnoxious and Barky’s still lying trying to save his party from a disaster this fall.

TO CELEBRATE SPRING,BARRY TWEETS PICTURE FROM 2009….OF HIMSELF

Posted by Pistol Pete

My fishing partner and I haven’t gotten a line wet together for the last couple years. He works full time and has a mowing/snowplowing business on the side. After my hospitalization last year I determined to make use of what time I have left. We’re going on a shopping trip to Gander Mountain today to restock the ol’ tackle boxes with hooks,lures and all manner of gadget we’ll probably never use,but being manly men we gotta have  it. Like the power tools I never use(much). C’mon,don’t tell me women don’t have shopping fetishes too.

Posted by Pistol Pete

As we are on the eve of the time Christians celebrate the crucifixion and resurrection of our Lord,Jesus Christ,I’d like to share a couple anecdotes from H.L. Mencken.

A church is a place where gentlemen who have never been to Heaven  brag about it to persons who will never get there.

A Sunday School is a prison where children do penance for the evil conscience of their parents.

God will never look you over for medals,degrees,or diplomas,but for scars….Elbert Hubbard

“Activists “(terrorists) from U Minn. are demanding campus police arrest Condoleeza Rice when she appears on campus.

These vile posters are plastered all over (I have a link to the story).

There is a link today about more range wars coming in the West.This is a map of government-owned land….this is appalling.

C’mon,Grunt…I haven’t posted one all week

OK, howzabout Slow Joe as one of the Three Stooges??

Posted by Pistol Pete

I post again. Why? Don’t have any better sense.

Some days it’s difficult to find enough interesting stuff to make a thread. Today ain’t one of those days.

This pathetic-looking little dweeb is the tragic result of a drunken one night stand Dirty Harry Reid had with a retarded desert tortoise. His name is Rory. He ran for governor in 2010 and all his campaign literature used was “Rory.” Never mentioned his last name since his daddy was and still is the most reviled man in the state. Rory thinks Clevin Bundy should be jailed and prosecuted.

So should you and your dad,dickhead.

OK,you got your picture,now get this goddam white brat offa me!

THE EMPEROR HAS HIS OWN MOMENT OF SILENCE FOR THE BOSTON MARATHON VICTIMS. NO MEDIA ALLOWED. JUST A HANDOUT OF HIM CLUTCHING HIS BALLS,AS HE ALWAYS DOES WHEN ADDRESSING THE AMERICAN PEOPLE.

NOW,IF YO BABY DADDY THROWS GANG SIGNS LIKE THIS,HE A CRIP. OTHERWISE,HE A BLOOD.

Posted by Pistol Pete

Today is the day we all must pay the price for the privilege of supporting the democrat constituency who vote for a living.The income tax obligation does not include Charles Rangel,Tim Geithner or other selected liberals who deem themselves as above the law.

It has also been one year since two Muslim mongrels murdered 3 people and maimed many others at the Boston  Marathon.One is frolicking with his 72 virgins,the other is,hopefully,rotting in a jail cell.

It was also 149 years ago that the 16th president,Abraham Lincoln succumbed to an assassin’s bullet.The killers name was John Wilkes Booth.He instigated what was at the time the largest manhunt in our brief history.We all know this.We were fortunate enough to be educated when teachers still taught.Lord knows what the newer textbooks will say about those racist,obviously republican Southerners.

I SAW THE BLOOD MOON AT ABOUT 1:00 AM,BEFORE IT BECAME OBSCURED BY CLOUDS

OBVIOUSLY DONE BY A VICTIM OF THE PUBLIC EDUCATION SYSTEM

DON’T YOU HATE PEOPLE  WHO PARK LIKE ASSHOLES??

Added by CtH … stuff I saw on Facebook and Twitter

Posted by Pistol Pete

It was in the upper 60s yesterday,it will drop into the 29’s with snow late this afternoon.On April 14.Al Gore,KMA!

Grunt got a shoutout from the Earl of Taint today.Nice job,Grunt.

Barry hosted a prayer breakfast today.That must have made him uncomfortable.I’m including a couple links with some of his cringeworthy comments.It’s a wonder God didn’t strike the heretic blind.

As usual,after a weekend I have stories backed up like a port-a-potty at a DNC convention.

Obama Admin Bans Junk Food in Schools

In another from-the-top decree, President Obama and his USDA have used regulatory powers to officially ban all junk foods from the nation’s schools.

http://www.breitbart.com/Big-Government/2014/04/13/Obama-s-Gov-t-Bans-All-Junk-Food-in-Schools

APPARENTLY THE RULES DON’T APPLY TO THEM

THE MASTERS TOURNAMENT WAS HELD THIS WEEKEND IN AUGUSTA,GA….NOT EVERYBODY LOVES THE BAMSTER DOWN THERE