WATCH: Trump prays at the McLean Bible Church with Pastor David Platt in the wake of the Virginia Beach mass shooting pic.twitter.com/cpqs7efVYg
— Bloomberg Originals (@bbgoriginals) June 2, 2019
NBA to Assign ‘Adversity Score’ to Pudgy White Guys Who Want to Play Professional Basketball
From The Babylon Bee.
U.S.—The NBA announced Friday that for the upcoming basketball season, the league will be assigning an “adversity score” to overweight white dudes to help more of them get signed with professional basketball teams.
The score will take into account many environmental and biological factors, like the fact that they’re white guys who can’t jump and get winded while walking up a small flight of stairs. It will also take into account the fact that they don’t know anything about the fundamentals of the game and tend to shout things like “I’m open! Hey, I’m open!” even when they’re clearly not open. Finally, white dudes who scarf down whole bags of Cheetos daily, drink a six-pack of beer every night, and haven’t exercised in years will receive a “considerable boost” from the new weighted point system.
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Fake Experts
I was a (female) school bus driver in New York State when the “right turn on red” law was enacted. When I stopped and stayed at a red light with my right blinker on, my cocky high school passengers (male) started shouting, “Right on red, dummie! Right on red.” I kept my foot on the brake and calmly informed them that New York’s new right on red law specifically forbade a loaded school bus from turning right on red. Derp. Continue reading
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2020
STEVE HILTON: This is an excellent rant! – Washington’s political and media establishment have lost their minds. If there’s any justice, we’d kick out the lot of them and replace them with normal people who can calmly work with each other and the president to get things done.
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Bits & Bytes
OUR LADY OF LAUS: The Catholic Church has officially recognized these Marian apparitions as being of divine origin. Her messages condemning abortion and perversion are particularly appropriate for our time.
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Bits & Bytes
MASCOTS: Bunny’s class had a special language arts event for parents. I’m so proud of her for reading a story she wrote into a microphone in front of a room full of people! Mama Buzz says, “She did a great job!”
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Mueller Shoots Off His Mouth
May 29, 2019: Special Counsel Robert Mueller, in his first public appearance since being appointed to lead the Russia investigation.
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