RECALL: The Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC) is recalling all models of Fisher-Price Rock N’ Play sleepers after it was linked to over 30 infant deaths. Continue reading
Bits & Bytes
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Trump 1: Lefties 0
The courts have imposed a 20-day detention limit for those we allow across the border. After that, these people must be released into the U.S., mostly into cities on or near the border.
A majority of asylum-seekers are not eligible for asylum and they know it. Once they’re released, they never show up for their hearings. Continue reading
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Bits & Bytes
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Scientists Recommend Reducing the Number of Democratic Presidential Candidates to Help Fight Climate Change
From The Babylon Bee.
Scientists have issued a dire warning: the current number of Democratic presidential candidates is simply unsustainable.
“No one ever thought this many people would run for president,” said climate scientist Dr. Raymond Hall, “and the planet just can’t take it. We’re talking each of them eating up resources vying for airtime, printing stickers with trite slogans, and flying from Iowa to New Hampshire. If they were actually all to be in one place for a debate, it would be an ecological disaster.”
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Bits & Bytes
MASCOTS: Cherry blossoms in Maryland – “This is what I’m looking at right now, sitting in my car with window open while Buzz and Bunny have therapy and Bootz naps in his car seat.” – Mama Buzz
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Bits & Bytes
ASKING FOR HELP TAKES COURAGE: We have value because a Higher Authority says so. Tissue alert.
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2020
WAR CHESTS: Top earners among those who revealed their first quarter take —
- Bernie Sanders = $18.2 million
- Kamala Harris = $12 million
- Beto O’Rourke = $9.4 million
- Pete Buttigieg = $7.1 million
- Cory Booker = $5 million
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Guest Post
It’s been a while.
First, I want to thank Almighty God for keeping us safe during our latest challenges. My wife was out with her friend last Saturday when she lost her balance and fell backwards, hitting her head, which required 9 staples to close the wound. Sunday as I was going to visit her an SUV cut into my lane., I swerved to avoid hitting it and in so doing I destroyed my car and another parked car. I got some bumps and bruises but I’ll be OK.
I took her home yesterday and got a call from our landlord. About a year ago our toilet overflowed and leaked through the ceiling in the downstairs apartment. The guy who had moved in down there is very unfriendly and complains about everything.He complained about still getting water seeping in,although we haven’t had a problem in over a year. He also griped about my wife running our washing machine at 2 in the morning. He’s on disability and doesn’t work. The landlord said if he complained again he would evict us after being faithful tenants for almost 11 years. Continue reading
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Bits & Bytes
Sorry, guys, but I’m not feeling too well today, so here is the no-frills stuff I gathered yesterday. I’d appreciate your prayers. Thanks! CtH
WAR ON TERROR: President Trump has designated the Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps (IRGC) as a Foreign Terrorist Organization. This is the first time America has labeled part of another government a terrorist organization. The move “recognizes the reality that Iran is not only a State Sponsor of Terrorism, but that the IRGC actively participates in, finances, and promotes terrorism as a tool of statecraft.”
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Joe Biden Admits Past as Shampoo Fragrance Secret Shopper
From The Barbed Wire.
WASHINGTON – He’s having to come clean now that he’s about to run for president in 2020. Creepy Joe Biden has now admitted that repeated photos of him sniffing women’s hair was all just part of the job.
“I was a shampoo fragrance secret shopper for several decades,” Biden admitted in a statement on Friday. “You can understand now why I was getting so close and handsy with all those women. But I couldn’t blow my cover. I’d lose the $100 gift certificate they gave me for each survey I turned in.”
The former VP refused to name the hair care product company who hired him for the job. However, Biden did admit to once getting caught in the White House, freebasing shampoo samples in his office. “Barack walked in on me, so I had to tell him. He said he understood that the Vice-President doesn’t make a lot and it was cool that I had a side gig to bring in a little spending money.”
“Ash Carter’s wife, Stephanie, had a delightful bouquet of Mirabelle plum, lemon, lavender and seaweed extracts radiating from her hair. It was intoxicating, and I forgot where I was for a moment.”
Biden spokesman Bill Russo told reporters, “Mr. Biden has a strong affinity for brands like Bumble and Bumble, True Botanicals, and Head & Shoulders. You’ve noticed he likes to hold onto the shoulders while he smells the head. I’m sure the women don’t mind.”
(Inhales deeply)…”She’s definitely a Mermaid Hair girl. I could practically taste the piña colada from the scent.”
Russo said he thinks the explanation of Biden’s side job will appease confused voters. “I’m hopeful this revelation will make any images of Joe getting uncomfortably close to random women seem less creepy than he really is.”
Also from The Barbed Wire:
Ocasio-Cortez: Lincoln Might Be Alive Today If US Had Gun Control in 1860’s
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