‘What Do I Have to Be Thankful For?’ Asks Man Whose Heart Is Beating

From The Babylon Bee.

LYNNWOOD, WA—Sources confirmed Thursday that local freethinker Jared Olson called into question the “absurd” idea that he had anything to be thankful for, all while his heart continued to beat regularly as it has done since before his birth, pumping blood through his body in a complex, life-sustaining process well beyond his mind’s capability of understanding in its entirety.

“I really don’t understand what all I’m supposed to be thankful for,” a slightly drunken Olson opined, addressing whichever members of his extended family were within earshot, as the membrane across his larynx vibrated to modulate the flow of air from his lungs, making his speech audible to the people listening, whose intricate ear structures then instantly transformed the invisible sound waves into abstract thought in their brain’s nervous tissue.

Olson went on to pursue the line of reasoning even further, noting that he was passed up for a job promotion that he was “really expecting,” in the same year his dog died. According to eyewitnesses, he spoke these words as the surface his feet rested on continued to spin around the earth’s core without any input from him, all while the only known habitable planet on which he stood rocketed around the center of the galaxy in perfect formation at the unfathomable rate of 490,000 miles per hour.

At one point during his monologue, Olson reportedly glanced around the room to notice several members of his healthy, caring family staring at him, his eyes’ hundreds of millions of cone and rod cells responding to stimuli in an unimaginably sophisticated procedure that he never has to think about. As these elaborate structures continued to capture and process an unbelievable volume of input per second, Olson reported he was all the more confident from the looks of those around him that he had made his case.

“Thanksgiving? Pssh—thanks for nothing,” Olson remarked, before somberly digging into a meal the likes of which the vast majority of the world’s population could only dream of eating.

Also from The Babylon Bee:

Atheist Prepares to Offer Heartfelt Thanks to Random, Uncaring Universe on Thanksgiving

Nation Approves Plan to Push Hollywood into Pacific Ocean

Confirmed: Judas Iscariot Finished ‘Your Best Life Now’ Immediately Before Betraying Jesus for Money

After Two Brief Decades of Deliberation, Democrats Bravely Call for Bill Clinton’s Resignation

E.P.T. Introduces Pregnancy Tests for Men

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Thanksgiving Smiles

Wishing everyone a wonderful Thanksgiving.

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In Case You Needed a Laugh

First a word from our sponsors: The admins here (two lovely and frightfully smart ladies) and me, the village idiot, are going to suspend the normal political diatribes until after the holiday. We will, however, bring you some special features.

I’d like to express for myself, and quite probably my buddies here, my profound thanks to all of you for stopping here. We don’t have a donation button or beg-a-thons like some sites. We do this as a public service and because we enjoy it. It is gratifying to know that so many of you feel we are worthy of a little bit of your time.

OK, now the fun stuff.

Many television shows have produced episodes to coincide with holidays like Thanksgiving and Christmas.

WKRP in Cincinnati was a 70s sitcom with an excellent ensemble cast. The following is one of the funniest bits ever filmed. No doubt most of you have seen it, but maybe it’s been a while. It will be the best 4 minutes you’ll spend today listening to Les Nessman describe the carnage as the turkeys go splat on the pavement.

Cheers was another funny scene.  Poor Norm.

A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving

MADtv – Dot’s Thanksgiving Play (I REALLY ENJOYED MADtv)

DeNIRO AND CRYSTAL… TWO SCREAMING LIBS, BUT PRETTY FUNNY TOGETHER

AND NOW FOR SOMETHING TRULY BIZARRE

The Muppets Audition for The Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade

MY GRANDPARENTS GOT A COLOR TV ON OCT. 4, 1964 (it was my sister’s birthday).

I REMEMBER WATCHING THE MACY’S PARADE IN COLOR FOR THE FIRST TIME. IT WAS AMAZING.

Red Skelton was a comic genius and a real American original.  In 1952 he addressed his audience this way:

A Thanksgiving Day Message From Red Skelton from 1952

On the day before Thanksgiving every year Rush Limbaugh relates the story of the true meaning of Thanksgiving.  It was all about the abject failure of socialism and the power of capitalism.You’re probably familiar with it, but here is the transcript and the audio.

Rush Limbaugh has made it an annual tradition to take a moment before the holiday to tell “the true story of Thanksgiving,” a holiday about which many of the historical facts are often left out and much of the true meaning has been lost in the simplified and politically correct version of the tale. The true story, he explains, highlights the faith and courage of the Pilgrims, the partnership between the settlers and the Native Americans, the failure of socialism and the power of free enterprise.

http://www.dailywire.com/news/11070/rush-limbaugh-tells-true-story-behind-thanksgiving-james-barrett

I WOULD BE REMISS IF I DIDN’T GIVE THANKS TO ALMIGHTY GOD FOR DELIVERING US FROM LIBERAL TYRANNY AND GIVING US A PRESIDENT WHO WORSHIPS HIM AND NOT A FALSE IDOL.

First Lady Melania Trump Receives the White House Christmas Tree

Psalm 28:7

The Lord is my strength and my shield;
in Him my heart trusts, and I am helped;
my heart exults,
and with my song I give thanks to Him.

Colossians 3:15-17

And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

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Reality Check

2017_11 16 Keystone leak

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Checking in with Los Feliz

Los Feliz Daycare (motto: “We do not accept immunized children”) is an ultra-progressive child care center in an unspecified affluent neighborhood on the left coast. Some recent tweets:

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4 Pete’s Sake… Monday, November 20

So much to do, so little time. I have a couple things in mind to do here in the next day or so, so keep checking back. It all depends on when I can fit things into my busy schedule of sleeping, eating, and watching old westerns on television.

Many Christian conservatives are backing Alabama’s Roy Moore
THEY DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY THESE IGNORANT REDNECKS DON’T JUST DO WHAT THEY’RE TOLD, LIKE THE LIBERAL LEMMINGS DO.

That steadfastness is shocking to many outside Alabama who wonder how any voter who claims to be Christian can stand with a man accused of such acts. The answer is both complicated and deeply rooted in the DNA of a state that prides itself on bucking norms.
The state’s motto — “We dare defend our rights” — is an upfront acknowledgement of a fighting spirit that has put Alabamians at odds with the rest of the nation for generations.

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/many-christian-conservatives-are-backing-alabamas-roy-moore/

Alabamians won’t quit Moore because he never quit them
Alabama’s Christian conservatives see Roy Moore as their champion. He has battled federal judges and castigated liberals, big government, gun control, homosexuality, Muslims and anything else that doesn’t fit the evangelical mold.

The Republican Senate candidate has long stood with them, and now, as he faces accusations of sexual impropriety including the molestation of a 14-year-old girl, they are standing with him.

http://www.breitbart.com/news/some-alabamians-wont-quit-moore-because-he-never-quit-them/

Democrats Dump $250K a Day into Partial Birth Abortion Candidate Doug Jones Campaign to Beat Roy Moore

Democrats are pumping $250,000 a day into the pockets of Doug Jones, the liberal candidate running against Roy Moore in Alabama.  Doug Jones supports partial birth abortion up to the day a baby is delivered.

AND THE RNC AND THE NRSC HAVE BOTH CUT OFF FUNDING FOR JUDGE MOORE. HE’S FACING THIS MONETARY ONSLAUGHT TO DESTROY HIM ALL ALONE.

Democrats Dump $250K a Day into Partial Birth Abortion Candidate Doug Jones Campaign to Beat Roy Moore

The Hill: Roy Moore Still in the Race, Senate GOP Running Out of Options

“Nothing has worked. Moore is still in the race,” The Hill’s Alexander Bolton wrote Sunday about the GOP establishment’s efforts to oust Judge Roy Moore from the U.S. Senate race in Alabama.

The article claims the Senate GOP is “running out of options to stop Moore.” It details national Republican leader’s rhetoric and efforts to get Judge Moore, who resoundingly defeated their preferred candidate, appointed incumbent Sen. Luther Strange, in the September primary, to drop out of the race.

http://www.breitbart.com/2018-elections/2017/11/19/hill-senate-gop-running-options-stop-moore/

Border Patrol Agent Killed While On Duty In Texas
Agent Rogelio Martinez and his partner were responding to “activity” while on patrol near Interstate 10 when both reported they had been injured and were in need of assistance, according to a statement from Customs and Border Protection (CBP).
Shortly after CBP confirmed Martinez’s death, President Donald Trump said the incident showed the need for a wall along the Southwest border.

“Border Patrol Officer killed at Southern Border, another badly hurt. We will seek out and bring to justice those responsible. We will, and must, build the Wall!” the president tweeted Sunday night.

http://dailycaller.com/2017/11/19/border-patrol-agent-killed-while-on-duty-in-texas/

Mediaite Puffs Chris Cuomo: He’s Nonpartisan? And Fights Like Muhammad Ali?
I ONLY INCLUDED THIS SO I COULD STATE MY PERSONAL OPINION THAT THIS WORTHLESS PUNK WOULD BE MIXING PAINT AT HOME DEPOT IF IT WERE NOT FOR HIS LAST NAME. LIKEWISE RONAN FARROW, MIKA BREZWHATEVER, AND ANDERSON COOPER VANDERBILT.

DePaolo compared Cuomo to Muhammad Ali in his interviewing skills, and bizarrely insisted he’s not a partisan. He never got around to asking if perhaps viewers could suspect he’s a Democrat, since his father and brother have been liberal-Democrat governors of New York.

Will Cuomo need to step aside from anchoring duties if his brother Andrew runs for president? Mediaite isn’t asking the tough questions. They’re asking the public relations department questions. The puffery started right from the beginning: Oh, my, Chris’s tweeting, so impressive!

https://www.newsbusters.org/blogs/nb/tim-graham/2017/11/19/syrupy-mediaite-super-sugar-puffs-chris-cuomo

REPORT: ‘Next Wave’ of Sexual Harassment Allegations Set To Rock Washington

If you thought the sexual harassment allegations would stop at Senator Al Franken, you’re sadly mistaken. According to Axios reporter Jonathan Swan, claims against the Democrat lawmaker are the “very tip of the congressional iceberg.”
NOTHING WILL COME OF THIS. LAWMAKERS EXEMPT THEMSELVES FROM THE LAWS THEY PASS FOR REGULAR PEOPLE FOR A REASON.

“A Republican source told me he’s gotten calls from well-known D.C. reporters who are gathering stories about sleazy members,” says Swan.

As previously reported by Cristina Laila, Congress has a rampant sexual harassment problem. In fact the problem is so bad that female lawmakers and aides keep a ‘creep list’ of men who are notorious for lewd behavior.

REPORT: ‘Next Wave’ of Sexual Harassment Allegations Set To Rock Washington

Sen. Al Franken WON’T resign over THAT shocking picture

Sen. Al Franken, the Minnesota Democrat accused of kissing and groping a radio personality in 2006, won’t resign, a spokesperson said.  Instead the embattled senator will spend his Thanksgiving holiday in Washington, D.C., where he’ll be ‘doing a lot of reflecting.’

On Thursday radio talk host Leeann Tweeden came forward and shared how Franken grabbed her breasts without her permission while she was asleep.  She also said he stuck his tongue down her throat as he tried to kiss her as part of a USO show.
TO FEEL REMORSE ONE MUST HAVE A CONSCIENCE. DEMOCRATS DON’T CLAIM TO BE MORAL ANYWAY, SO THEY CAN’T BE HYPOCRITES.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-5098237/Sen-Al-Franken-won-t-resign.html#ixzz4yyHAfnAc

New Orleans elects LaToya Cantrell first female mayor: Another win for identity politics

Mainstream media is hailing Cantrell’s win as a breakthrough for identity politics. Meanwhile, the crime-ridden, impoverished city of New Orleans has been run by a Democratic mayor since 1872. Coincidence?

LaToya Cantrell has a tough job ahead. New Orleans is a poverty-stricken, dangerous city whose homicide rates per capita are higher than Chicago — the murder capital of the United States.

Nine of the 10 most dangerous cities in the United States were run by Democrats as of 2015, according to LawStreet. The 10th city had an Independent mayor.

http://www.bizpacreview.com/2017/11/19/new-orleans-elects-latoya-cantrell-first-female-mayor-another-win-identity-politics-564834

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In Memoriam

Sadly, we have to add another name to the list of those who have left us. A brilliant writer and singer, Mel Tillis, passed away at the age of 85.

Mel Tillis, Singer-Songwriter and Country Music Hall of Famer, Dies at 85
THERE ARE A LIMITED NUMBER OF TALENTS WHO ARE SO UNIQUE YOU HEAR THE VOICE AND KNOW INSTANTLY WHO IT IS.  THIS GENTLE SOUL WAS ONE OF THEM.

“Mel Tillis spent a lifetime giving us joy and laughter and music, which is why his death brings such sadness,” said Country Music Hall of Fame and Museum CEO Kyle Young. “Had he never stepped on a stage, he would still have been one of the funniest and most genuine people on the planet.”
http://variety.com/2017/music/news/mel-tillis-dies-dead-1202618649/

THEN THERE’S A MISERABLE SPAWN FROM HELL WHO HAS FINALLY GOTTEN WHAT HE HAS DESERVED FOR MORE THAN 50 YEARS.

Charles Manson, cult leader and serial killer who terrified nation, dies at 83Charles Manson, the fiery-eyed cult master whose lemming-like followers staged a bloody two-night murder rampage in Los Angeles in 1969 that gripped the city with fear and shocked the nation, died on Nov. 19 at a hospital in Kern County, Calif. He was 83.

A spokeswoman for the California Department of Corrections and Rehabilitation confirmed the death by email, saying he died of natural causes. Mr. Manson, who was serving a life sentence at California State Prison in Corcoran, Calif., had had health problems in recent years and was hospitalized in January for gastrointestinal bleeding, according to news reports.

http://www.msn.com/en-us/news/crime/charles-manson-cult-leader-and-serial-killer-who-terrified-nation-dies-at-83/ar-BBFjW5u?li=BBnb7Kz&ocid=UE12DHP

 

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The Democrat War on Women

Democrats are such hypocrites. They routinely rant and rave about how the GOP is allegedly waging a war on women, ridiculing gentlemen like Vice President Pence and inventing faux gender crimes like Massachusetts Governor Romney’s “binders full of women”, which were actually binders full of women’s resumés that had been compiled by his gubernatorial staff, so he could pack his administration with highly qualified women.

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Meanwhile, they continue to vigorously protect their own powerful males by strong-arming female victims who dare to speak out.

  • Congresswoman Debbie Dingell, who told CNN that a ‘prominent’ senator shoved his hand up her dress in 1981, says she is still AFRAID to name him!

Clearly, George Soros and his cabal of Democrat PTBs are DONE with Bernie Sanders and the Clintons.

  • A former Bernie Sanders volunteer reported she was sexually harassed while working on his presidential campaign.
  • A former Hillary Clinton organizer reported she was sexually harassed while working on her presidential campaign.
  • Radio host Rita Cosby asked Hillary Clinton point blank if she regretted the way she treated the women who accused Bill of abusing them.

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Sources:

 

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Bigoted Progressive Christian Refuses to Call God by His Preferred Pronouns

From The Babylon Bee.

PORTLAND, OR—Local bigot Jordyn Michaels reported Wednesday she is still refusing to call God His preferred gender pronouns, insisting on referring to Him as “God the Mother,” “She,” and “Her,” sources confirmed.

 

Despite being called out for hate speech by her fellow progressives, Michaels continues to refuse to utilize the pronouns God used for Himself in the Bible.

“I know our great Mother God never refers to Herself as a woman in the Scriptures, but I’m gonna go ahead and do it anyway,” the backward, prejudiced woman said on a Patheos blog entry entitled “Discovering Sacred Serenity In Mother God.”

“I refuse to bow to male normative traditions imposed on me. My own feelings dictate reality, and right now they’re dictating that God can be communicated with as a female if I really want Her to be.”

At publishing time, the hopelessly bigoted woman had confirmed she would continue upholding oppressive gender norms by referring to God with female pronouns that were created by a patriarchal gender construct.

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Holy Crap! It’s Almost Thanksgiving!

It just came too quick this year. It’s one of those rare times when there are 5 Thursdays in November, giving retailers that precious extra week to push their stuff. I hear this year’s hot toy is Fingerlings, some sort of interactive monkey that fits on your finger. I saw a sign at WalMart the other day that said a limit of 2 fingerlings a day. I also heard about something called Hatchimals, which are like an egg and some sort of critter is supposed to hatch out of it. All sounds too creepy to me. Thank goodness my youngest grandchild is 10 and just about over most toys. My wife finally got a smart phone earlier this year and the 10 year old showed her how to operate it and downloaded some apps, whatever they are, for her. I hate being an electronic retard in the digital age. Fortunately I can extort labor from my kids when needed by reminding them who taught them how to use a fork and use a potty.

[CtH:  ROFLLL ::snort::]

OK, now for the depressing crap.

Hillary Clinton: Bill ‘didn’t tweet’ about his problems in the White House
DID SHE REALLY SAY THAT? AL GORE HADN’T INVENTED THE INTERWEBS WHILE FORMER PRESIDENT BEN T. PENIS WAS IN THE WHITE HUT.

Hillary Clinton took a jab at President Trump on Saturday, joking that as president, Bill Clinton didn’t tweet like Trump does.

“He didn’t tweet about it, he went to work about it, and he actually got things done,” Hillary noted, which got a loud round of applause. Twitter, of course, didn’t exist in the 1990s when Clinton was president. It was founded in 2006.

Ukraine’s southern counteroffensive ‘gathering momentum,’ leaving some Russian troops ‘highly vulnerable,’ says UK intel

Progressives call for replacing Al Franken with Keith Ellison as support for resignation builds
SOME CHOICE…A SMARMY LITTLE PERVERT OR A VICIOUS MUSLIM

Justice Democrats, a group of former Sanders campaign staffers and others prominent leftists, launched a petition Thursday asking Mr. Franken to resign following the release of a photo showing him groping Leeann Tweeden as she slept on a 2006 USO tour.

“Franken must go. We do not tolerate those who abuse their power,” said Justice Democrats PAC executive director Saikat Chakrabarti in a statement. “Representative Keith Ellison has a proven track record of integrity and fighting for progressive principles.”

https://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2017/nov/18/progressives-call-replacing-al-franken-keith-ellis/

Radio Host Grills Hillary Clinton: Do You Regret Attacking Your Husband’s Sex Victims?

Radio host Rita Cosby grilled failed presidential candidate Hillary Clinton over the sexual assault allegations against her husband former President Bill Clinton. The weekend WABC-AM radio host asked Clinton point blank if she regretted the way she treated the accusers.

For decades, both the media and political class protected former President Clinton and his wife from questions such as these. Times have truly changed.

Radio Host Grills Hillary Clinton: Do You Regret Attacking Your Husband’s Sex Victims? (AUDIO)

Hillary Clinton Responds To Gillibrand Comments: ‘I Don’t Know If We Can Rewrite And Revise History’

Glamour Magazine 2017 Award Show Completely Ignores Conservative Women
WHAT THEY DON’T GET IS THAT CONSERVATIVE WOMEN DON’T NEED AWARDS AND ACCOLADES TO VALIDATE WHO THEY ARE.

Award recipients included California Congresswoman Maxine Waters, late night host and comedian Samantha Bee, and all of the organizers of the Women’s March.
Waters won the “Lifetime Achievement Award.” According to Glamour, this award was well deserved:

“With 37 years of public service under her belt, veteran lawmaker Representative Maxine Waters (D–Calif.) has long wielded her unapologetically laser-sharp tongue—surgical in its precision, devastating in its impact—in service of her progressive politics,” Glamour wrote of its decision to honor Waters with its “Lifetime Achievement” award.

https://townhall.com/tipsheet/timothymeads/2017/11/18/glamour-magazine-2017-award-show-completely-ignores-conservative-women-n2411430

Influx Of Puerto Ricans To Orlando Could Change The State’s Political Landscape

Already, approximately 168,000 Puerto Ricans have flown into Florida to land in cities like Tampa, Fort Lauderdale, Miami and Orlando in the aftermath of Hurricane Maria. Half of those arrivals usually migrate to Orlando, a city that has seen its Puerto Rican population reach over 1 million since 2000.

The influx of Puerto Ricans could change the political landscape of Florida, a notorious swing state. Most Puerto Ricans tend to vote Democrat and some of the islands’ residents have grown upset with comments from President Donald Trump on the state of Puerto Rico’s infrastructure and its effect on the United States’ budget.

[CtH: Only cuz the MSM reported so dishonestly about Trump re: Puerto Rico. Like that basketball dad, they don’t want to know or talk about anything good Trump does.]

http://dailycaller.com/2017/11/18/influx-of-puerto-ricans-to-orlando-could-change-the-states-political-landscape/

Flake on Hot Mic: GOP Will Be “Toast” If it’s The Party of Trump, Moore
Coming from the guy who was so far behind in reelection numbers that he announced his retirement last month.

http://www.hapblog.com/2017/11/flake-on-hot-mic-gop-will-be-toast-if.html

Trump To Spend Thanksgiving At Mar-A-Lago

President Donald Trump will spend Thanksgiving with his family at Mar-a-Lago.
Trump is expected to arrive at his Florida home on Tuesday and leave Sunday, according to a Federal Aviation Administration advisory about a “VIP” movement.

The president dubbed Mar-a-Lago “the Southern White House” in February. He has spent 25 days at the property during his presidency, according to an NBC report.

http://dailycaller.com/2017/11/18/trump-to-spend-thanksgiving-at-mar-a-lago/

US civil rights leader Jesse Jackson has Parkinson’s disease

SO THE REVEREND IS UP AGAINST SOMETHING HE CAN’T BULLY OR PULL THE RACE CARD ON.

“My family and I began to notice changes about three years ago. For a while, I resisted interrupting my work to visit a doctor,” Jackson said in a statement.

“After a battery of tests, my physicians identified the issue as Parkinson’s disease, a disease that bested my father.”

Jackson said he would make “lifestyle changes,” concentrate on physical therapy to slow disease progression, and planned to work on his memoir.

http://www.breitbart.com/news/us-civil-rights-leader-jesse-jackson-has-parkinsons-disease/

Trump Calls Clinton ‘Biggest Loser Of All Time,’ Says, “Get On With Your Life”

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Filed under Al Franken, Bill Clinton, Democrats, Donald Trump, Hillary Clinton, Jesse Jackson, Keith Ellison, Maxine Waters