Posted by Pistol Pete
Category Archives: Funny Stuff
Riffing on Sandra
This is a family site, so y’all are just going to have to click the linkies. (You’re already clicking on them, aren’t you? hee hee)
Graphic: 2012_03 08 Nancy shocked at bad words about Fluke > Values – Left v Right
Chrissy’s Site Bites: http://news.webshots.com/photo/2651819760056011884veLBmO
Thanks to http://terrellaftermath.com/ for permission to post.
I read what Fancy Nancy had to say about Fluke’s “courage” in coming forward. There was this one bit about how horrible it was for one student who was told right at the pharmacy counter that her insurance didn’t cover birth control and she was OMG embarrassed and OMG had to walk away.
Well, crap. I guess we just should take a big black Magic Marker to that damn First Amendment thing about religious freedom and force that damn Catholic college to pay for her damn birth control. Right? I mean, What Would Jesus Do? LET her be EMBARRASSED?! It’s unspeakable. It’s outrageous. It can’t be allowed!
Graphic: Fluke leading the Leftists > Values – Left v Right
Chrissy’s Site Bites: http://news.webshots.com/photo/2518786520056011884ifQNhw
H/t to angelaisms for idea about using Delacroix’s famous “Liberty Leading the People.”
THE THURSDAY GRUDGE
Posted by Pistol Pete
As usual,there is a veritable plethora of agita-inducing outrages to pore over.Its only going to get worse,friends.It is critical that we stay united and support each other to survive the upcoming maelstrom.
Somewhere my Honors English teacher,Mrs. Ford, is smiling.
MAKING TAKERS OUT OF PRODUCERS
http://www.rushlimbaugh.com/daily/2012/02/15/making_takers_out_of_producers
THE RISING FEVER OF DESPOTISM
http://www.americanthinker.com/2012/02/the_rising_fever_of_despotism.html
Their headline:
TOP BARGAINERS ANNOUNCE TAX CUT DEAL
My headline:
REPUBLICANS ROLL OVER AND EXPOSE THEIR THROATS LIKE A BETA DOG WHEN THEY FEAR THE ALPHA MALE
Which do you prefer?
http://townhall.com/news/politicselections/2012/02/15/house_leaders_praise_emerging_payroll_tax_cut_deal
OLBERMANN AND KOS:RAPE AT OCCUPY ‘NOT THAT BIG OF A DEAL’
Like they say,you can’t fix stupid
WEST:DEMOCRAT HANDOUTS AN ‘INSIDIOUS FORM OF SLAVERY’
http://thehill.com/blogs/floor-action/house/211055-rep-west-democratic-handouts-an-insidious-form-of-slavery
GUNNY WANTS YOU TO VOTE
Ad sponsored by NRA
CAR DEALERS FEAR COSTLY FUEL EFFICIENCY STANDARDS WILL PRICE MILLIONS OUT OF MARKET
http://www.theblaze.com/stories/dealerships-fear-costly-fuel-efficiency-standards-will-price-out-millions-of-consumers/
WHITNEY HOUSTON’S CRITICS CALLED HER ‘TOO WHITE.’ BLACK REPUBLICANS CAN RELATE
http://townhall.com/columnists/larryelder/2012/02/16/creators_oped
SARAH PALIN: ‘I’M GAME’ TO RUN FOR FUTURE OFFICE.IN EVENT OF BROKERED CONVENTION ‘ALL BETS ARE OFF!’
I don’t know what she’s doing.There is no doubt if she was in the race from the beginning it would be over by now.I understand her not wanting to subject her family to the hell they would no doubt be put through, but if anybody could explain how everything starts with the cost of energy she could.
http://www.theblaze.com/stories/sarah-palin-im-game-to-run-for-future-office-all-bets-are-off-in-event-of-brokered-gop-convention/
BOR:IF OBAMA WINS REELECTION YOU WILL NOT RECOGNIZE THIS COUNTRY IN FOUR YEARS
EVER SEE A LIBERAL GET DEPANTSED AND TAKE A BARE-ASS SPANKING?WATCH THIS
THE SCRUBBING TO BENEFIT OBAMA HAS BEGUN
http://iowntheworld.com/blog/?p=119663
THE ONLY THING THAT WOULD MAKE THIS BETTER WOULD BE IF HE PUT ON SOME DARK GLASSES
WHEN I PROOFREAD THIS,I SAW I WAS SHORT ON MY SNARK QUOTIENT.I ADDED A BUNCH OF STUFF THAT EVAPORATED INTO SPACE.I’LL TRY ONE MORE TIME.
HEAD OF WORLD BANK TO STEP DOWN;U.S. EYES SPOT
WHO WOULD OBAMA NAME?
HER?
OR HER?
TIME FOR SOME GOOFY STUFF
DINER SUFFERS CARDIAC ARREST AFTER EATING 6,000 CALORIE ‘TRIPLE BYPASS’ BURGER AT HEART ATTACK GRILL
This is called the Darwin method for taking morons out of the gene pool
WOMAN ATTACKS BOYFRIEND WITH KNIFE OVER VALENTINE’S DAY SNUB
Hell hath no fury like a scorned woman having a heavy flow day
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/valentines-day-gift-assault-654912
SITE HELPS FLORIDA COEDS FIND ‘SUGAR DADDIES’
Granddad always said it was just as easy to fall in love with a rich woman as it was a poor one.
I said ‘Yeah,but the lines are longer.’
THE WEDNESDAY GRUDGE
Posted by Pistol Pete
Thank you all for your kind words and prayers.I could not ask for a more loving,caring group of people to call my friends.Chrissy,I was surprised to hear we’ve had the same experience.I’ll definitely use the Nature’s Sunshine HS-2,if you can tell me where to find it.
While I was doing transport,I worked one Saturday even though I was really sick.When I got back to the office I called DW and told her when I got home she was taking me to the emergency room.I had a fever of 102 and an x-ray showed I had pneumonia in my left lung.The doctor said my blood oxygen level was 72 and by law I couldn’t leave until it was at least 90.I spent over an hour breathing albuterol through a nebulizer.He said I probably have sleep apnea,but my body has adjusted to the low oxygen level.
When you start thinking death can come quickly it puts things in perspective.I consider myself fortunate to have grown up in a slower,more innocent time in America.Life was far more family-oriented and less cynical.Dad went to work,Mom took care of the house and she was always there when you got home from school.When mom said: ‘wait till your dad gets home’ it really meant something.
When somebody fom the neighborhood or from church suffered a hardship we didn’t whine about the government helping out.We offered anything we had to help because they would surely do the same.
Between my junior and senior year in high school one of my classmates got pregnant and her parents had to take her out of school.Now they have daycare for student mothers because it’s so commonplace.
We went from pickup baseball games at the park and reading 10 cent comic books to who had the fastest car or the loudest 8 track tape player.We cruised the local root beer stands and parked in the back row with our girl friends at the drive-in movie theater.I won’t go into details–I’m a gentleman.
I remember how things were and see how they are now and I can’t help but feel sad for those who will never know what it was like to have pride in who you were,where you lived,what you did and found satisfaction in never asking anybody for anything.
NOW BACK TO YOUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED REPORT
THE OBAMA DEFENSE STRATEGY IS LESS DEFENSE
Iran and North Korea are ramping up their nuclear weapon developement so we’re cutting our stockpile of warheads from 1500 to 300.Yeah,that makes sense.
http://news.investors.com/Article/601130/201202141753/obama-defense-spending-cuts-cant-afford.htm
IRAN STOPS OIL EXPORTS TO 6 EU COUNTRIES
So Barry nixes the XL pipeline so we won’t get any oil from Canada.What a brilliant internationalist this clown is.
http://www.reuters.com/article/2012/02/15/us-iran-oil-europe-idUSTRE81E0QA20120215
OBAMA REPEALS FIRST AMENDMENT
http://www.crisismagazine.com/2012/obama-repeals-first-amendment
A TEA PARTY SENATE TAKEOVER
A majority in both houses is meaningless if Barky is still in office
http://townhall.com/columnists/michellemalkin/2012/02/15/a_tea_party_senate_takeover
I COULDN’T CUT THE DEFICIT IN HALF BECAUSE RECESSION WAS DEEPER THAN I THOUGHT
OBAMA FOLLOWS HIS OWN ADVICE TO ‘GO BIG’ ON VALENTINES DAY–TAKES MOOCH FOR EXPENSIVE MEAL AT A TOP DC RESTAURANT
A thought just occured to me.Can you see these two rolling in the hay?
‘Move your ass,Barack,I can’t see the TV screen.’
Actually,when they roll in the hay Barry feeds it to her.
CAN OBAMA ORDER GROCERS TO GIVE AWAY BREAD?
http://cnsnews.com/blog/terence-p-jeffrey/can-obama-order-grocers-give-away-bread
DID CAPITOL POLICE COLLUDE WITH WIS. TEACHERS UNION TO OCCUPY CAPITOL?
WHY DO DEMOCRATS WANT TO PROTECT VOTER FRAUD?
Well,duh
PRE-SCHOOLER FORCED TO EAT CHICKEN NUGGETS BECAUSE LUNCH MOM PACKED DID NOT MEET GOVERNMENT STANDARDS
This may be the most disturbing story of the day.Now we’ll have federal lunch inspectors to make sure your kids are eating government approved meals.How did we ever get to this?
OBAMA THE GREAT
“The world will little note,nor long remember
Barack Obama, because contrary to his own opinion, he is the nation’s worst president. He is an arrogant, hyper-partisan, race-baiting, committed socialist — a man whose deliberate attempts to transform the nation into a banana republic, with pictures of himself on the side of every building, have been thwarted only by his need to win one more election.
http://www.americanthinker.com/2012/02/obama_the_great.html
Read more: http://www.americanthinker.com/2012/02/obama_the_great.html#ixzz1mSqbY8Ys
How I chose “Golden Jubilee” and other random thoughts
English has three prefixes meaning half:
demi-, hemi-, and semi-.
Do we need three prefixes with the same meaning? No. But English is greedy like that … just grabbing words from anywhere and everywhere to add to the glorified, hard to learn, hard to spell, but fantastically FUN and USEFUL language it is.
demi- … demigod (a half god, not quite a god) … came from Latin
hemi- … hemisphere (a half sphere) … came from Greek
semi- … semicircle (a half circle) … came from French
Put together, you get one of my all-time favorite words:
hemi-demi-semiquaver (what Brits call a sixty-fourth note).
What fun writing a blog can be! When I googled to double-check my facts, I stumbled on some new words for my all-time favorite list:
The Brits call a double whole note a breve and a single whole note a demibreve.
I can’t help it … these just make me think of “boxers or” and the enormous quantities of giggling that must break out whenever the junior choir master gives them any manner of instruction about their breves and semibreves.
Never mind junior. I once took down an entire college history lecture because the professor said something about what some historical legal genius had said in his briefs and … I couldn’t help it. I just flashed on this really famous, important guy wearing nothing but tighty-whiteys and started to giggle.
You know how, if one person is giggling, it’ll get the next person going until, pretty soon, the whole room is whispering and snickering?
So finally the prof asks, “What did I say that was so funny?” Which just made me laugh even harder.
He totally deserved it. He’d come into class and say something totally random that would only be funny to people who had watched his favorite show (Monty Python). Then he’d watch who laughed.
Anyway, back to the Brits wonderfully absurd music words.
The half note is a minim, the quarter note is a crotchet (snort) and the eighth is a quaver. From there, they go to sixteenth (semiquaver), thirty-second (demisemiquaver), and still my favorite, just because it’s so fun to say, sixty-fourth (hemidemisemiquaver).
Another factoid I just learned: there is actually a 128th note. I did not know this. The Brits have TWO words for this note that is so short, it’s hardly a sound at all. And both of them are longer than the note.
Quasihemidemisemiquaver and semihemidemisemiquaver.
I dare you to say that second one three times fast. Ha! I’m beginning to see why English is such a screwy (and fascinating) language. The Brits invented it.
How did I get on to this?
I was trying to remember (or find out) the something-centennial word for 50 years.
A friend is celebrating the SEMI-CENTENNIAL anniversary of taking his permanent vows into the Holy Cross brotherhood and I wanted to congratulate him.
The 50th anniversary is also called the Quinquagenary or Golden Jubilee.
I’m having another ah ha moment about why that first one isn’t in common use. Criminetly, it’s hard to say!
I think I’ll use “Golden Jubilee” for his congratulations message. It sounds much more celebratory than “Semi-centennial.”
Have I ever mentioned how much I love words?
P.S., quasi- (resembling in some degree) came from Latin.
———
Sources:
http://voices.yahoo.com/how-increase-vocabulary-fractional-prefixes-1725471.html?cat=4
Filed under Funny Stuff
THE RONALDUS MAXIMUS BIRTHDAY GRUDGE
Posted by Pistol Pete
TODAY WOULD BE RONALD WILSON REAGAN’S 101ST BIRTHDAY.
WE MISS HIM STILL
Re:yesterday’s subject:Grandma was fond of saying ‘Profanity is the feeble attempt of a weak mind to express itself forcefully.’ I NEVER FORGOT IT.
PETE HOEKSTRA IS RUNNING FOR THE SENATE AGAINST DEBBIE SPENDITNOW.THE LEFT IS DISPLAYING THEIR USUAL INDIGNANT PUFFERY OVER THE AD.PETE DEFENDS IT.I THINK IT’S CUTE AS HELL.
LET THE WOOKIE EAT RED VELVET CAKE
After that she can start on a crusty old pair of my shorts.
http://spectator.org/archives/2012/02/07/let-mrs-obama-eat-red-velvet-c
DEMOCRATS CONTINUE INTERNET COUP WITH NEW CYBER BILL
http://dailycaller.com/2012/02/06/democrats-to-continue-internet-coup-with-new-cyber-bill/
CAMPAIGN DONATIONS FLAGGING,OBAMA URGES RICH TO BACK NEW SUPER PAC
Remember when he sat the Supremes in the front row at SOTU a couple years ago then ambushed them over the Citizens United decision?I do.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/feedarticle/10080588
LIBERALS ARE THE TRUE AGGRESSORS IN CULTURE WARS
The meek may inherit the earth,but I’d rather stare into my enemies’ dead,vacant eyes
LET’S ALL HELP BARRY FIND HIS MIND–HE SEEMS TO HAVE LOST IT SOMEWHERE
THE OBAMA ADMINISTRATION IS IN FOR AN ENORMOUS BATTLE WITH THE CHURCH
He’s gambling there are enough CINOs to carry him.
That’s also why he’s hoping for a Mormon opponent.Ever consider that?
OK,LADIES,DON’T SAY I NEVER DID ANYTHING FOR YA!
TEACHERS’ UNION STAFFERS SET SAIL ON 7-DAY CARIBBEAN CRUISE
I’m glad to see they’re putting all the taxpayer money Obama throws them to good use.
TEACHERS’ UNION BOSS WITH $550,000 SALARY TO POOR: ‘LIFE’S NOT ALWAYS FAIR’
TINGLES:OBAMA’S SMILE ‘WORTH FIVE TO TEN POINTS’ ON ELECTION DAY
How can you tell he’s smiling with your head buried so far up his ass,Chris?
http://newsbusters.org/blogs/noel-sheppard/2012/02/06/chris-matthews-obamas-smile-worth-five-ten-points-election-day
ROMNEY TURNS FIRE ON SANTORUM
There are caucuses today in 3 states:Colorado,Missouri and Minnesota.Santorum is leading in at least two of them.
http://thehill.com/homenews/campaign/209025-romney-turns-his-fire-onto-santorum
JAY CORNHOLE:PEOPLE DROPPING OUT OF THE WORKFORCE IS ‘ECONOMIC POSITIVE’
They can get unemployment under 8% if they can get another million people to quit looking for work so they don’t have to count them.
EVIL REGIMES STICK TOGETHER IN VILE VETO
http://news.investors.com/Article/600292/201202061852/america-impotent-in-un-on-syrian-bloodshed.htm
CBS: ‘HIDDEN’ FEES PAYING FOR OBAMA TAX CUT
http://www.breitbart.tv/cbs-hidden-fees-paying-for-obamas-tax-cut/
THE AUDACITY OF OBAMA’S SECULARISM
http://spectator.org/archives/2012/02/07/the-audacity-of-obamas-secular
MODEL HAS NATURAL 20 INCH WAIST
Is that a big deal?Looks kinda creepy to me.
http://shine.yahoo.com/fashion/model-natural-20-inch-waist-182500417.html
THE REAL AMERICA
Consevatives still outnumber liberals by a wide margin
http://www.americanthinker.com/2012/02/the_real_america.html
MME BOTOXIA:2012 A CURSE OR A BLESSING FOR DEMS?
In war,they say you never hear the one that gets you.Hear that clicking,Nan?That’s America cocking the hammer.
http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0212/72481.html#ixzz1lhACkwcJ
ENOUGH OIL?
http://www.americanthinker.com/2012/02/enough_oil.html
WASTEFUL SPENDING
Make sure you’re sitting down when you read this
http://www.therightscoop.com/wasteful-spending-half-million-to-study-why-monkeys-throw-feces/
FUROR OVER EASTWOOD’S BAM-BOOSTING AD
When are the taxpayers going to get back the billions Bam stole to get a foreign company to buy them?
http://www.nypost.com/p/news/national/furor_over_clint_bam_boosting_chrysler_IUKJ9GA1HZCDzZ5T8o4S6M
ILLINOIS CARP HUNTERS RELEASE NEW VIDEO
I’ve fished this part of the Illinois River for Walleye and White Bass(sometimes called stripers,because of their markings.)PETA’s all upset,but Asian carp are nasty,voracious feeders who grow as long as they live and starve out natural fish populations.I must admit,though,I’ve never worn a football helmet while fishing.
ENERGY PRICES NECESSARILY SKYROCKETING;GAS HEADING OVER $4/GAL.
If Barry manages to steal another term we’ll remember $4 gas as fondly as we used to remember $2 gas
I swear I start every day to keep these short and concise.As usual,that ship sailed some time ago.Still,nobody complains.
THE SATURDAY GRUDGE
Posted by Pistol Pete
To those to whom it is relevant;Cathy arrived home yesterday,safe and sound.Needless to say,Mrs. Pistol and I were gobsmacked.She loves her new dress and I’m sure would like to tell us of her journey.
Words cannot express my gratitude for the warmth and compassion you all show in so many ways.You fill an emptiness in my soul and give my simple life purpose.It is a privilege to count you all as my friends.May God grant you the kind of peace and happiness I have found by loving and following Him.
IT’S CALLED ABORTION,PROFESSOR HARRIS-PERRY
This is the newest sow in the BS-NBC’s mud wallow.She discusses Komen,but just can’t bring herself to use the a-word.
http://newsbusters.org/blogs/mark-finkelstein/2012/02/03/its-called-abortion-professor-harris-perry
RACE FOR THE SMEAR
A cancer charity gets a lesson in abortion politics
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052970203889904577200982136408586.html?mod=WSJ_Opinion_LEADTop
HOUSE REPUBLICANS WANT JUSTICE TO INTERVENE IN FIGHT OVER SOLYNDRA WITH OBAMA
Suuure…all they have to do is sprinkle a little fairy dust on him and suddenly he’ll start doing his job upholding the law,rather than obstructing it.
WHEN I WAS A KID I’D MAKE FACES AND GRANDMA WOULD SAY: ‘WHAT IF YOUR FACE FROZE LIKE THAT?’
THEN I LOOK AT PRINCESS BOTOXIA AND I REALIZE WHAT SHE MEANT
COL. WEST:SOMEONE’S ‘PLAYING AROUND WITH’ UNEMPLOYMENT NUMBERS
It’s called the Potomac Two-Step,Colonel.It’s not like the Army,where words like truth,honor and courage mean something.
http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-briefing-room/news/208613-rep-west-responds-to-jobs-report-someone-messing-with-census-numbers
BREAKING NEWS!!!JACK-IN-THE-BOX NOW OFFERING BACON MILKSHAKES
Things that make you go eeeewwwwwww!
A FRUITBAT F**KS A CHIPMUNK AND YOU GET….HENRY WAXMAN!
REID: ‘NO,I DON’T PLAN TO BRING A BUDGET TO THE FLOOR THIS YEAR’
Harry,you are as cowardly as you are vile,mean and repulsive.But,hey,nobody’s perfect,right?
http://hotair.com/archives/2012/02/03/reid-no-i-dont-plan-to-bring-a-budget-to-the-floor-this-year/
FOOL ME TWICE
Jews were hornswoggled(like that word?)into thinking this affirmative action wonder boy who listened to anti-semitic rants from a steaming pantload for 20 years actually cared about Israel.
Grandma used to say a dog knows when it’s being tripped over and when it’s being kicked.
http://townhall.com/columnists/carolineglick/2012/02/03/fool_me_twice
MURDERED BORDER PATROL AGENT BRIAN TERRY’S MOTHER TO HOLDER: ‘YOU’RE A COWARD AND A JOKE’
She was being more polite than I would have been.
SEVEN LAWS TOU HAVE TO FOLLOW BUT MEMBERS OF CONGRESS DON’T
These may surprise you
ROSY JOBS REPORT A RUSE
http://www.nypost.com/p/news/business/rosy_report_ruse_LsXHVA9epmxGzTBHeOW6WP
ILLINOIS IS BROKE,SO LET’S SPEND MORE
That’s how it works in our state
http://www.americanthinker.com/blog/2012/02/illinois_is_broke_so_lets_spend_more.html
THE TEACHINGS OF JESUS VS. OBAMA
This is a must-read;it compares quotes from the real messiah vs. the wannabe
Maybe Chrissy can post this–it’s that good
http://iowntheworld.com/blog/?p=117280
THIS IS ALL I NEED TO SEE OF THIS PIECE OF CRAP MOVIE
WOMAN SAYS SHE FAILED SOBRIETY TEST BECAUSE HER LARGE BOSOM THREW HER OFF BALANCE
Any comment on my part would only tend to incriminate me.
http://iowntheworld.com/blog/?p=117352
BEST SUPER BOWL ADS
10 youtubes worth watching
http://dailycaller.com/2012/02/03/best-super-bowl-ads-video/
polination.blog 